“Abide in My Love” by D. Todd Christofferson

Does God’s unconditional love mean we will receive blessings unconditionally? Does His love flow to us without requiring our commitment to Him?

These kinds of mistaken assumptions are why Elder Christofferson is hesitant to describe God’s love as “unconditional”:

[God’s] love is described in scripture as “great and wonderful love,” “perfect love,” “redeeming love,” and “everlasting love.” These are better terms because the word unconditional can convey mistaken impressions about divine love, such as, God tolerates and excuses anything we do because His love is unconditional, or God makes no demands upon us because His love is unconditional, or all are saved in the heavenly kingdom of God because His love is unconditional.

And yet “unconditional” captures the sense that God sees in us far more potential than we see in ourselves, that He is far more willing to forgive us on conditions of repentance than we are to forgive ourselves, that feeling this love “while we were yet sinners” (Rom. 5:8) inspires us to change. Elder Christofferson describes this sense, too, using Helen Keller’s life as an allegory:

In a movie depicting the life of Helen Keller, her parents are portrayed as satisfied with Anne Sullivan’s work once she has domesticated their wild daughter to the extent that Helen will sit politely at dinner, eat normally, and fold her napkin at the end of the meal. But Anne knew Helen was capable of much, much more and that she had significant contributions to make. Even so, we may be quite content with what we have done in our lives and that we simply are what we are, while our Savior comprehends a glorious potential that we perceive only “through a glass, darkly.” Each of us can experience the ecstasy of divine potential unfolding within us, much like the joy Helen Keller felt when words came to life, giving light to her soul and setting it free.

Ultimately, abiding in God’s love requires the kind of commitment and devotion found in marriage. Indeed, it is the very constraints and commitments within that relationship that allow its love to embrace the totality of the other person — from their strengths and attractive qualities to their weaknesses and vulnerabilities. So it is with God: only by devoting ourselves entirely to him can we feel how boundless His love for us actually is.

Read the rest of Elder Christofferson’s address at lds.org.

“Love Takes Time” by Marvin J. Ashton

Elder Ashton had a lot of really sensitive things to say about how people work and what makes them special. This talk, “Love Takes Time” from the October 1975 General Conference, demonstrates that insight.

Ashton frames the process of developing and sustaining love using two verses from the Gospel of John: “If ye love me, keep my commandments” (John 14:15; italics added) and “If ye love me feed my sheep” (John 21:16; italics added). These “God-given proclamations,” he writes, “should remind us we can often best show our love through the processes of feeding and keeping.”

Highlights:

True love is a process. True love requires personal action. Love must be continuing to be real. Love takes time.

When were you last fed by a family member or friend? When were you last given nourishment for growth and ideas, plans, sorting of the day, sharing of fun, recreation, sorrow, anxiety, concern, and meditation? These ingredients can only be shared by someone who loves and cares.

In the usual routines of life often courtesy, consideration, and kindness are best exhibited in the little day-to-day meaningful expressions that denote real love.

Read more about Elder Ashton suggests we can grow into love at lds.org.